How To Survive Moving To A Smaller City
It’s been 40 days since I’ve moved to my smaller hometown, after living in the capital city of Romania (aka Bucharest) for 5 years.
I’ve been preparing for this change of scenery for almost one year, but when the time came, I realized that I’m not ready at all. Although my mind was set on leaving, I hated the fact that everything will change once again: my routine, my job, my home, and my friends. All I could think of were the pretty things that made me happy in the last 5 years, even though I knew exactly what were the reasons for which I chose to leave.
Bucharest is a very beautiful city, with wonderful architecture and a lot of social and cultural events. If you want to focus on your career and learn as much as your brain can manage, this is the most suitable place in Romania. I really loved it, but only when the streets were empty. It is the 5th most congested city in the world, the air is polluted, everybody is always in a hurry and everything is a competition. Even though I had access to a bunch of events, job opportunities, coffee shops, restaurants or malls, I lacked the one thing that I care about most – genuine human connection. So I decided to focus on the long term bigger picture and get my ass back home.
A couple of days after moving, I started panicking. Even though I was surrounded by my family, I’ve never felt so alone. So I began questioning myself – did I really make the right decision? Every evening, after driving around through the city, I used to sit in my parked car in front of the house and scroll my Facebook newsfeed for at least one hour. After which the crying usually began for another 15 minutes.
I felt that I couldn’t go back, but in the same time, I couldn’t stay there either. It felt like crap… a terrible uprooting feeling was flowing through my veins and I didn’t know how to stop it. So I didn’t.
Even though my initial plan was to start a vlog and a digital agency as soon as I move back home, I just couldn’t do it. Nothing made sense and I couldn’t find my purpose anymore. But that was ok. I learned that sometimes you just need to be patient and do nothing if you don’t feel like it: just watch TV, go shopping, sleep, eat junk food and stop judging yourself. Also, I tried to do the things that usually help me overcome sadness.
After a month and a half, I’ve finally started to get used to my new life, even though it was difficult as hell. It still is, but time heals all wounds so it will heal mine too. Sooner or later, everything gets better.